Why do we feel lonely?
8 billion people, the internet that keeps the world connected, thousands of books to read, endless news to watch, super smart phones to keep us entertained, and we still feel lonely. How the f*** is that even possible?
I have to admit that I feel lonely for the major part of the day. I should also tell you that I have a family that loves me, relatives who care for me, friends who are just a call away and a job that I enjoy. I wonder why I still feel lonely when I have so many lovely people around me?
I sat one day to figure out from when exactly did I start feeling lonely? I am definitely sure I never encountered loneliness as a child. I was maybe left alone at times but never felt lonely; even when I had no one around and had nothing to do. I think maybe it's because as a child I never thought about who I was and what I wanted? I look back and realise those are the 2 questions for all the misery in my life. Okay, let me explain.
In my early childhood I didn't know that I belonged to a country. When I got to know I was an Indian, naturally I started to think that Indians are my people and the rest of the world are not. Then, I was told I am from Andhra Pradesh and the people from the other states are not ours. As I grew older I learnt that Hyderabad is my city and only Hyderabadies are our people. Do you see how the circle started becoming smaller and smaller? It didn't stop there. The circle became so small until I believed that all I have in this world is just my blood family. The same way I was told that I belonged to a specific religion, caste, and a sub-caste too. The people around me made me dislike/hate everyone who doesn't belong to us. 8 billion people would have been my family if I didn't start to think where I belong.
Likewise, as I experienced life I started to define myself which formed my ego. Everything I think I am is all made up by my own mind. I created psychological boundaries and I still keep defining myself because I want to be somebody.
From being nothing I became someone and belonged somewhere. My world has become smaller and smaller day by day physically and psychologically. The smaller my world is, the lonelier I am. This is the biggest revelation of my life. Now, I'm learning to unlearn everything I have learnt all my life and become nothing again. When you become nothing, you experience the ultimate freedom in life. Isn't it?
I heard somewhere - We spend 50 years of life becoming something and the remaining 50 to unlearn everything and become nothing.
I have to admit that I feel lonely for the major part of the day. I should also tell you that I have a family that loves me, relatives who care for me, friends who are just a call away and a job that I enjoy. I wonder why I still feel lonely when I have so many lovely people around me?
I sat one day to figure out from when exactly did I start feeling lonely? I am definitely sure I never encountered loneliness as a child. I was maybe left alone at times but never felt lonely; even when I had no one around and had nothing to do. I think maybe it's because as a child I never thought about who I was and what I wanted? I look back and realise those are the 2 questions for all the misery in my life. Okay, let me explain.
In my early childhood I didn't know that I belonged to a country. When I got to know I was an Indian, naturally I started to think that Indians are my people and the rest of the world are not. Then, I was told I am from Andhra Pradesh and the people from the other states are not ours. As I grew older I learnt that Hyderabad is my city and only Hyderabadies are our people. Do you see how the circle started becoming smaller and smaller? It didn't stop there. The circle became so small until I believed that all I have in this world is just my blood family. The same way I was told that I belonged to a specific religion, caste, and a sub-caste too. The people around me made me dislike/hate everyone who doesn't belong to us. 8 billion people would have been my family if I didn't start to think where I belong.
Likewise, as I experienced life I started to define myself which formed my ego. Everything I think I am is all made up by my own mind. I created psychological boundaries and I still keep defining myself because I want to be somebody.
From being nothing I became someone and belonged somewhere. My world has become smaller and smaller day by day physically and psychologically. The smaller my world is, the lonelier I am. This is the biggest revelation of my life. Now, I'm learning to unlearn everything I have learnt all my life and become nothing again. When you become nothing, you experience the ultimate freedom in life. Isn't it?
I heard somewhere - We spend 50 years of life becoming something and the remaining 50 to unlearn everything and become nothing.
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